Next Stop, The Hamptons…

This will be my third year hitting up the Hamptons, specifically Montauk, for the July 4th (J4) weekend. When I entertained the idea of going for the first time, I remembered being a little anxious. Would I be suffocated by pompous pricks or snubbed by judgmental jerks?

Yes, it’s not cheap and yes, it’s exclusive, but not for the reasons you may think.

Space is just as limited here as it is in NY. Plus, renting your home, much less a room, is illegal. You will get a hefty fine, to say the least, if you’re caught. Don’t let the neighbors notice a few cars lined up in your driveway without you around.

Hotel you say? Those options are limited in this little island. You won’t see a Marriott anywhere near here. If you reserve early enough in the year with a mom and pop motel, expect higher end Vegas hotel prices.

Getting invited to a house is where it’s at if you know the right people. Last year, we stayed at a massive home that slept 23. All adults. All successful. All ready to mingle and indulge. A chef, a koi pond and a private pool were just a few of the amenities included. This was the best adult camp ever!

Oh, the Hamptons. Here are some details I observed when I first got there…

  • Planes, Trains and Automobiles. That is exactly my travel itinerary when coming from the Atx and probably from anywhere if you fly into JFK. Expect a 2.5 hr train ride on the LIRR (Long Island Rail Road) upon arrival then a cab to the final destination. There are helicopters and bus options if you have the right resources lined up. Just know, it is a full day, but it certainly comes with full times of fun.
  • It is an adult playground. Most of the kids you find are the ones at the bar and many over 30. The sophisticated ages over that fit in quite well.  Don’t get me wrong, there are some families around, but it’s minimal. The island certainly caters to the lively crowd during the summer.
  • With that said, if you like 80’s or 90’s jams, this is your place! It’s confetti of genres. The more expensive it is to have fun, the higher the ages.
  • As far as food, you pay for what you get. My favorite hot spot I WILL visit again this weekend – Crow’s Nest.  I have yet to stop thinking about the Blue Crab Tagliatelle. I’ll trade sex for that with a glass of Negroni any day. (Sorry Mom!)
  • Bring lots-o-cash. Uber or any other transportation companies cannot establish here. The local taxis service monopolizes this place. One year, I spent the same amount on taxis as I did on airfare – and that was just my contribution when riding with a group. Yep.  There are other options, like a bus, I’m sure.
  • It’s a seasonal place. When it’s hot, it’s hot. When it’s not, it’s a quiet. Hence, it’s not built to scale. Don’t be surprised by the lines.

I’ve had a few friends that seem to have no interest in visiting. I find out usually that it’s their pre-conceived (negative) assumptions that keep them away. The area is lovely. The scene is fun. The people of all types and all kinds are nice. Everyone is ready to get know one another.

Make it a goal not to be too quick to a judge place before visiting. Experience it for yourself.
I’m sure there will always be even a little amount of pricks and jerks here just like anywhere.  

There are plenty of lists that will give you all the information you could possibly want about the Hamptons.

If you want a closer E on Hamptons experience, follow the fun on Instagram @Elisaut Enjoy the updates in my Insta-stories leading up to and through J4. #allthisweek

Will this be my last year….? Let’s see how I handle it this week. E is adulting.

‘Til Next, Elisa

Ps. The featured image is one of my favorite places that is no longer around, Moby’s. Sigh. I was a kid in a candy store those nights. 🙂

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